now that my life has 'calmed' a bit, i am now able to focus on my great escape from the world of engineering. i have never been more certain of anything in my life. i want out. even better, my gut wants out. the hours i spend at what is now termed 'the day job' are little more than a research opportunity in how to feng shui the hell out of cubicle space...and a way to make a paycheck. of course. after all, isn't that the reason a majority of us walk through the doors of drudgery on a daily basis?
this being said, i am now working on growing two small businesses that will eventually squeeze out the 'day job.' i find time to work on these part-time endeavors at home either very early in the morning or very late at night. interestingly, despite these odd hours, i have more energy working on my businesses than i do when "fresh" in the morning at my 'day job.' that says something.
even more telling...
#1 i am absolutely stepping out of my comfort zone these days. i am learning about marketing, networking, accounting, and most importantly, human relations (obviously NOT a forte in the world of engineering :). i am having to become brave when it comes to contacting people out of the blue, being direct, and possibly asking for help, or even accepting help while understanding that people really do want to help, which has always been difficult for me. i am making phone calls, not sending emails (that's a big deal for me!). i am setting appointments with people to talk over coffee and presenting information in different ways. i am asking THEM to be open-minded enough to take a look at what i am doing, which is something i am very excited about! and despite being so uncomfortable most of the time, i am having a blast! i am learning so much about myself and other people and believe so much in what i am doing that i keep going, keep pushing myself, keep growing...and i am very excited to see where this leads me.
but...
#2 i have also learned that this "change" in my direction has also changed the way i perceive some of my relationships with family and friends. at a time when i am heading in a totally new direction, when i could absolutely use the support of some key people in my life, some of those people are turning away from me or immediately making incorrect assumptions. even if i am asking for nothing more than an opinion, or advice on how to go about doing something better, or just an ear for 5 minutes (i am working on things to make THEIR life better!), i get the 'what's wrong with what you're doing now?' or the 'why are you doing this?' or the 'anyone could do this, you could do so much more' or, even better, i am ignored. i feel like they don't trust me, and given that, do they really know me? on the other end of the spectrum, i am learning that some people are really stepping up to the plate, so to speak! they are very excited to learn more about what i am doing, offer advice, perhaps even get involved. they support me, and they are simply open to learning something new, worst case! all this is very telling. right now, i need to surround myself with positive people, and i am beginning to learn that a number of people in my life, some i thought were totally on my side, are just kinda negative, close-minded, and don't seem to give a rip about what i am up to. consequently, i am starting to reassess the people i surround myself with...get rid of those "negatrons." boo.
1 comment:
People are resistant to change. And someone like you making the changes you're making, is the most scary. Because it means that we don't have to stick with the status quo and instead would actually look at our lives and what we're doing and try to make changes, which is hard as hell and just as scary.
I saw the website today, looks great! Very exciting. =)
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