hey stranger!!!

at least i feel like one. i've said it once, i'll say it again...i SUCK at this blog thing! at least now i have a reason to write more, or at least gear up to write. i am going to bali for three weeks in may. true, life has not ended with my job, although my boss was less than pleased to hear i wanted that much time off. OH. MY. GOD. the world will explode without me being there! quite a compliment. :)

so yeah, bali. strange how this one developed. some of you may recall my time at nanosolar, back in 2003. i was less than a pleasant human being during that stint. i was dating a surfer when i started work there, so i obviously became more interested in the sport like any young, smitten girl who wanted to spend more time with her beau. fortunately, this was an interest that benefitted ME, and i really grew to like it. i purchased a surf magazine here and there so while i was relaxed in my warm living room, i could relive my time spend out in the cold, winter ocean. hmm. one day, i came across a picture of a surfer riding a perfect left break in bali. These breaks are rare in santa cruz, so this picture made me drool. the photograph was in sepia color, i recall, which made the image seem even warmer, cozier. just a feel good picture overall. i tore out this picture and hung it at work on my filing cabinet. at first, i would look at it every now and then, not taking too much time out of my day to dream because i was actually interested in my job. there were fun projects to work on, research to be done. however, as time moved on, the projects became less fulfilling, the management became even more cranky (it's all about "perception," he says!), and i wanted out...but of course, like a good little american worker bee trying to partake in the rat race, desperate for a pay stub, i stayed and TOOK IT. that photograph became my best friend, my escape from work. i would close my eyes and imagine being that surfer. and naturally, i began to look at that photo more and more and more with each passing day. i swore to myself that i would go to bali. ALONE. i wanted to experience that wave with no interference from anyone. COMPLETE SOLITUDE.

and then you know what happened next. that's right...life happened! i didn't make it to bali like i promised myself. i became a bartender and went to grad school. now i work as an environmental consultant, and i've hit that 6+ month period so the gig is not as exciting as it used to be. BUT, i now get to go to bali! for some reason, the trip just presented itself to me, on a platter no less. it was too easy! chips were falling into place left and right. it was if i could not be diverted from purchasing the ticket, like the stars were aligned, like i was being beckoned to this little island in asia. i won't question it. fortunately, my california tax return EXACTLY matched the cost of the plane ticket. ironic? so, in six weeks from today, i will be on a plane, destined to ride that wave i have been staring at for FIVE years. life is hilarious.

not to mention this is the first time i have ever traveled alone outside north america. i am a little nervous, but i feel like this is something i have to do RIGHT NOW. i absolutely feel like this trip has come along at this time because it is going to present challenges to me that i must face before moving onto something else that awaits me in my future. it's like a sort of spiritual preparation for something, where many lessons will be learned...which is a very, very strange feeling.

that being said, i plan to update my blog while i am there. stay tuned, and feel good. :)